bebeocho:

the worst part about being single is that i don’t get to be angry about there being crumbs in my bed. i just ate hint-of-lime tortilla chips cuddled up between my sheets and now bedtime is a crunchy nightmare, and whose fault is it? mine. i made my bed of chips and now i have to lie in it. i can’t berate anyone else for eating in bed because i did it, and i knew what i was doing, and now i’m dealing with the consequences. the only cause for my discomfort is my own lime-flavored hubris.